Writer: pHreaKie
TItle: Seinfeldisms 
Date: 4-1-98
Type: Misc

1. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle? 
2. Can fat people go skinny-dipping? 
3. Can you be a closet claustrophobic? 
4. Why is the word abbreviation so long? 
5. Is it possible to be totally partial? 
6. What's another word for thesaurus? 
7. If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success? 
8. If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their lights off? 
9. When companies ship styrofoam, what do they pack it in? 
10. If you're cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right? 
11. If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound? 
12. If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent? 
13. If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages? 
14. When it rains, why don't sheep shrink? 
15. Should vegetarians eat animal crackers? 
16. Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift? 
17. What do you do when you see an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants? 
18. Do hungry crows have ravenous appetites? 
19. Why is bra singular and panties plural? 
20. If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap? 
21. If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation? 
22. Instead of talking to your plants, if you yelled at them would they still grow? Only to be troubled and insecure? 
23. Is there another word for synonym? 
24. Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"? 
25. When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs? 
26. When you open a bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown away? 
27. Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"? 
28. Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food? 
29. Why do they report power outages on TV? 